Tuesday 2nd of June 2015 – Birdgate
When our cat, Rusty, dragged a creature into the hallway I was in the living room. I saw it and closed the door to the hallway. I thought it was a mouse, panicking and not knowing what to do I asked for help on Facebook.
As the Facebook thread is not public, I’m copying it here, with identities protected 😉
Me – Rusty brought a mouse in just now… It squeaked and its guts are hanging out. HELP!!!!!!! I’m locked in the living room
—
Yusuf – something big and heavy, smash it in ·2 June 2015 at 09:16·
—
Me – Nooooooooo! I can’t even bring myself to open the door and look at it again. It’s like a horror movie. Poor mouse
—
Yusuf – if it’s still twitching/squeaking it’s very much the right thing to do, or hope the cat finishes the job?
—
Val – omg i have just fainted ·2 June 2015 at 09:20·
—
Val – any neighbours to help? ·2 June 2015 at 09:21·
—
Yusuf – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejlLc5FAjV8
—
Me – I’m supposed to be doing Insanity right now, instead I’m being held hostage by my cat
—
Yusuf – a shovel is good. you can do the grim bit then pick it up and dispose of it nice and quick. ·2 June 2015 at 09:23·
—
Me – I’m going to get out through the living room door that opens to the garden, then assess the situation through the cat flap I think. (there are two doors to the garden). I can hear her rustling on the other side of the door, no squeaks.
—
Val – you are a braver woman then me. Where is J when you need him!! ·2 June 2015 at 09:24·
—
Me – at work·2 June 2015 at 09:24·
—
Me – And my son is doing one of his GCSEs so won’t be home until lunchtime
—
Val – Ring him and tell him it’s urgent and to come home asap lol ·2 June 2015 at 09:24·
—
Me – It’s fucking grim, even from cat flap. I *hope* it’s a mouse. ·2 June 2015 at 09:26·
—
Me – it’s moving, OMG, I can’t believe it. ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH ·2 June 2015 at 09:27·
—
Val – vomit smiley ·2 June 2015 at 09:27·
—
Me – PLEASE HELP! ·2 June 2015 at 09:27·
—
Val – so sorry i can’t help you, I wouldn’t have a clue what to do. This is what men are useful for! Grab a man off the street now! ·2 June 2015 at 09:28·Me – I can’t I’m in the living room, to open the front door I have to open the living room door, and the murder scene is right in front of it.
Me – I only have safe access to the garden ·2 June 2015 at 09:34·
—
Me – J! It’s cut open in the middle and moving around, it’s messed upVal – send Rusty back in? ·2 June 2015 at 09:28·
Me – I can’t believe how freaked out I am! I feel so helpless, it’s only a disembowled mouse
—
Me – She’s sat right next to it. ·2 June 2015 at 09:29·
—
Val – cheeky cow! ·2 June 2015 at 09:30·
—
Paula – Horrific
—
Me – I can’t even bring myself to open the door, honestly I’m absolutely horrified, I can’t control it. I thought I was braver than this
—
Val –
—
Paula – I’d be the same… shovel, scope, take outside… come on woman… you can do it… ·2 June 2015 at 09:32·
—
Me – but it’s still alive so it could jump out·2 June 2015 at 09:32·
—
Me – They should have a special police for these situations·2 June 2015 at 09:33·
—
Val – totally agree! I am freaking out too, i’m not helping the situation! ·2 June 2015 at 09:34·
—
Chris – shovel to the neck ·2 June 2015 at 09:34·
—
Me – shit, I think it’s a bird
—
Yusuf – be thankful it’s lost the power of flight! ·2 June 2015 at 09:38·
—
Me – looking very still right now, I’m going to open the door properly and assess the situation. ·2 June 2015 at 09:39·
—
Val – Ok. A bird is ok. A bird is not as scary as a mouse. It’s do-able! ·2 June 2015 at 09:39·
—
Me – Rusty is getting a massive bollocking from me. A bird being killed is more upsetting than a mouse for some reason…
—
Me – yeah, I opened the door again, and it’s a bird and it has moved since I last opened the door
—
Val –
—
Me – omg it’s wriggling and I never screamed so loud
—
Val – The humane thing is to just put it out of it’s misery but I know it’s easier said than done. Sending what little courage I have your way!! ·2 June 2015 at 09:43·
—
Val – *its
—
Yusuf – it’s part of keeping a (very cute) murderous psychopath for a pet. or clip it’s claws and stick a bell on it? it’s not fair to leave the bird to slowly die.
—
Yusuf – stiff drink?
—
Me – Rusty is smuggly sitting in the garden now, and refuses to come in when I call (she always comes) – because I told her off.
—
Nisha – Brick the poor thing. ·2 June 2015 at 09:52·
—
Me – I’m building up to doing something, plus I need the toilet
—
Yusuf – Nisha knows. ·2 June 2015 at 09:56·
—
Yusuf – fuck knows what rambo would do if you tried to clip *her* claws
—
Nisha – You’d be left with no eyes, or soul, if you tried to clip *her* claws. ·2 June 2015 at 09:59·
—
Nisha – She has such a bad reputation
—
Me – I think it may be headless
—
Me – maybe it’s his bum
—
Me – I have lost all ability for rational thought
—
Me – I used the telephoto lens for that, still can’t bring myself to go nearer. Pathetic ·2 June 2015 at 10:03·
—
Me – And cats aren’t murderous psychopaths ffs, they are cats. They do what cats do.
—
Val – omg omg omg! ·2 June 2015 at 10:08·
—
Me – It’s big innit? Almost edible
—
Me – Also if I smash its head in, which I can’t actually see, blood and guts will splatter EVERYWHERE (not that I have the nerve to do that)
—
Nisha – Carrier bag over the top
—
Yusuf – my cats are murderous psychopaths.
—
Leticia – ok, I put in on a shovel and it’s in the garden, poor little bird, I actually started crying, wtf. So, now you want me to kill it? It looks like a young one and opened it’s beak when I picked it up
—
Val – oh poor little baby
—
Me – J suggested put it in a bag and run it over with the car… ·2 June 2015 at 10:26·
—
Yusuf – that would do it ·2 June 2015 at 10:27·
—
Yusuf – bit long winded ·2 June 2015 at 10:27·
—
Nisha – That made me LOL ·2 June 2015 at 10:27·
—
Me – Honestyl I can’t bash it with the shovel, or brick ·2 June 2015 at 10:27·
—
Nisha – Innit. Just get over with. Poor things been suffering long enough. Make it quick now, friend x ·2 June 2015 at 10:28·
—
Val – omg J!!! ·2 June 2015 at 10:28·
—
Val – maybe just throw it and turn around ·2 June 2015 at 10:28·
—
Me – omg, I have done it, I put a bag over it and hit with shovel twice, it’s done, I’m sobbing – I think I need to be a vegetarian ·2 June 2015 at 10:31·
—
R Plunger – yeah, you probably do
—
Me – it was a chick, no feathers on its wings, must have fallen off the nest ·2 June 2015 at 10:31·
—
Nisha – Aww the first time I had to dispatch a living creature was horrible. Make yourself a nice up of tea xx ·2 June 2015 at 10:32·
—
Val – ah, well done, must have been awful, poor little chick but you did what was needed. Go inside now and have a strong drink Xx ·2 June 2015 at 10:32·
—
Me – Murder Scene
·2 June 2015 at 10:34·
—
Me – The bag came off after I hit it, got stuck to the shovel RIP little birdie ·2 June 2015 at 10:35·
—
Val – Not sure I wanted to see that, why oh why did I click on the picture
—
Gemini – You’ll get over it, honest. Chances are the thing was already wounded if it fell out of the nest, and tbh if you have cats you have to be able to put something out of its pain. I totally freaked first time I shot a rat, it doesn’t bother me now(not that it happens often) 2 June 2015 at 10:36
—
J – Well done. xxx
—
Me – yeah, I will be quicker next time. and yes, we have 100s of birds come into the garden every day, and she’s not interested. It’s the old, and nest fallers that get caught. It’s just it was the first time I had to do it. I didn’t expect to react so strongly to it!!!!
—
Gemini – I didn’t expect my reaction to my first ‘kill’ either, it’s a weird one. But at least I know I could kill for food now·2 June 2015 at 10:47·
—
Yusuf – (Lion King, Circle of life)
—
Me –
—
Val – bless u xx ·2 June 2015 at 12:33·
Other bird encounters that I wrote about (there were a couple of others I didn’t record)
. 19 July 2017 – Chimney Crow (to the future!)
. 10 Feb 2014 – A juvenile blackbird in our bathroom