RJ 17/10/1989 Tuesday

RJ 17/10/1989 Tuesday

I got back from Friburgo today.

Gabriel, baby Julia & me in Friburgo

There was a big kerfuffle. My father was going to pay for half my plane ticket yesterday, but his guarantor didn’t show up… So him and my mother had a big argument last night, over the phone, my mother called him irresponsible and there was a lot of phone slamming going on! I got angry and called him myself, he swore he was going to do it all today and would send the ticket. He just needs a guarantor to sign a piece of paper, that’s it! But he said his friend didn’t make it. I believe him… Then he said my mother had him arrested a while ago, because he wouldn’t pay my maintenance. Well, he should have paid up shouldn’t he? It was the court that sent him to prison, not my mum. Now he comes to me playing the victim, trying to poison me against my mother. I told him I wasn’t interested in their fights and that he should worry about me, not her. Then she started talking badly about him. Give me patience!

My mum doesn’t believe he’s going to pay so she concocted a plan. She borrowed the money for the ticket (that’s a whole other story) and she’s buying the whole ticket and will pay upfront instead of doing instalments. My dear father won’t know about this and will carry on paying the creditor the instalments, without knowing it’s been paid for. That’s assuming he doesn’t decide to stop paying! My mother spoke to the manager at Iberia and he’s going to pretend the money my father is paying is going to pay for the ticket, but instead he will forward it to my mother. We came to Rio, my mum had some money to pay for the other half and my aunt was paying the rest with the $300 she owed my mum. Oh dear, I don’t know how to describe this confusion!

Well, we got back here and I went out with Keyla to pick up her electoral title and then went to the PT headquarters with my mum. When I got here my aunt was home and my mum called her and it turned into an argument. First of all because my mum is intractable and the only subject she talks about with Zezé is the damned money. I told her a thousand times she shouldn’t keep demanding the money back at all, I think it’s an absurd after all the time Zezé looked after me. My mum isn’t that broke as she’s taking us to Madrid just for the sake of it, if she was that broke why spend time in Madrid? This makes my blood boil and I was horrible to her.

They put the phone down then she called again asking if she could sleep here but my uncle said NO (arsehole!). WHAT A MESS! Then there was crying and I realised my mum is under a lot of pressure, I cried and got angry. My mum said she was going to sleep on the street. It was insane! Then aunt Italia invited her to stay there and she said no, oh please, stop sulking. These family dramas are indescribable! It’s hard trying to make sense of them and describe it when I don’t understand what’s going on. It’s not worth wasting time explaining this madness.

My mum is going back to Friburgo as she’s been banished from my grandad’s and here. I like this because it’ll make her want to leave sooner, I’m sick of doing nothing all day. Am I selfish? Well, now that my mother changed the course of my life against my wishes I just want to take on the world!

I received a great letter from Rodrigo. He called me lazy and afraid for not going to Uberlandia, he wrote an ode to my too westernised ways, saying he’s too latin for me. Erm, Ok?! After taking the piss out of me in a fun way he said he found it hard to forget me, but he intends to (I won’t let him!). See what I’m missing out on because of MOTHER? It’s not easy to find a Rodrigo like this! But I’m writing back because he was also lazy staying with me and Patricia and it’s easy to criticise others and not look inside oneself.