RJ 11/07/1989 Tuesday
Went to the bus station with Zezé in the morning and bought my ticket to Brasilia! I’m going on the 21st! Then we went to Copacabana to get my mother’s grant money with Carmen, who arrived back from London. It was 2,300 dollars. Then we went to the bureau de change to exchange 150 dollars for my trip and 300 for Zezé to pay some of her debts. We collected some beauty products for my mum, ate and came back to Vila Izabel. I walked into the hairdressers and before I lost my nerve I asked for the hairdresser to chop it off. EIGHT fingers, or an open hand from little to big finger. He cut more than he should have done but it looks fine. I thought I looked weird at first as my hair was so long, down to my chest and now it’s above my shoulders. It’ll get back where it was again in year! Ana and Mauro came here to see my hair and watch The Color Purple. Half way through Gustavo calls saying he called on Sunday and no one answered… Must have called the wrong house! I was here on Sunday, and Maira was here on Monday. I didn’t tell him I’m going to Brasilia, he asked but I said I didn’t know if I was going. Now he knows what it’s like to feel unvalued.
He said he’s coming here tomorrow for us to smoke weed. He won’t even have time to think about staying with me. I’ll be kissing him way before. As soon as I get him out of my mind he calls! Me? I’m not playing games, I’m making the most of it! When I go to England I’ll forget him whether I want to or not…