London 23/11/1989 Thursday
People are so horrible, they can’t see someone happy and they start throwing flour in the ‘pirao’. Seems like a long time has passed since yesterday. These unexpected moments can last an eternity… Let me explain why I complain. David came here at 9 and stayed until 10, when my mum arrived. We had so much tea yesterday I was going to the toilet all night. So I introduced them to each other and he left.
Then the lecture started. ‘How do you bring a complete stranger here?’ She is completely right, of course, I know I was stupid, but it was so cold! I shouldn’t have done it, but it’s done. She kept on going for about an hour: that the English think foreigners are whores, that they are all perverts and that they are all mad. What a lot of nonsense! It’s like saying all Brazilians are thieves!!! She’s so bitter, my mum. I trust my instincts, let’s see what happens. I agree that a man who starts making conversation at random in the street doesn’t bode too well, but there are exceptions.
He came today (we arranged to go for a swim) and I was down, afraid and tired (didn’t sleep well, kept going to the loo and having dreams). He came ready to swim but I didn’t want to go. I said I was afraid and that I don’t know anyone and I don’t know what he thinks of me… He apologised, said he understood my mum and that there’s no need to worry.
Well, then we went for a very long walk, I never walked so much. I got a key cut for the door and he gave me a key ring for it. We met one of his SEVEN brothers! His eyes are like sky blue, very intense. Today he explained his father had a painting and decorating business and he was the only son with an interest in it, so he looks after the business. Very badly by the looks of it, because he wasn’t doing much work today. We were walking and he’d give me a kiss every 10 steps “I’m very glad to have met you! Do you like me? I make you happy?”. He made me feel good. We looked at records, jackets and ate. Then we went to a pub, I had some wine, him coke, and we had a game of snooker. I won one game and he won the other game.
David smoked hash in the middle of the street mixed with tobacco, I declined. We went to another park, it was a beautiful day, sunny and warm. We took a train back because my feet were really hurting me. When we got here I opened the door and bumped into Ms McKook, she had a terrifying face on, so I told David to go away. She started having a go at me, so I went to David’s flat instead. We got the key from his mum’s, saw the brother with intense blue eyes, he said hi. He said his mum thought I was nice, but he was just trying to flatter me. I really felt the cold today. We got on the bus and David just seems to know everyone! There were no lights in the flat, what the hell? The flat is big, but he says he stays with his mum, the flat is to ‘relax in’, is what I concluded. We downed a bottle of milk, he smoked hash again, my teeth were chattering with the cold, the heating wasn’t on. We hugged and kissed for an hour, then we left as my mum was due home soon. He said “I think I’ll fall in love with you”, I said “Me too” (My Inglish is very goode!) – the only missing thing were angels playing harps.
Got home and Ms McKook called me to talk about David, she said the same as my mum really. She’s very friendly. After my mum got in she came up for a chat. They said for us to go slow (they don’t even know about our love affair), not to bring him there, get to know him more.
Ok, people! I should really be worried, start going out with someone the day we meet it something only someone crazy, naive or stupid would do. But I’m young (as Chico Buarque says), and young people don’t incarcerate themselves in the prison of predictability. I have worried enough, if it goes wrong it goes wrong. People keep filling my head with their prejudice and paranoia. If it doesn’t work it doesn’t work. They are worried about being robbed or raped. He gave me a photo of his, a little teddy bear. He knows about Gino, my boyfriend in Brazil and he told me about a girlfriend he had for 5 years. Five! She dumped him for someone else. That’s it, tomorrow we will take some photos.