BSB 04/07/1986 Friday – second time smoking weed
Got 77% in History and 70% in EMC, but I failed Physics with 40% on the exam and 36% overall. On our way back, Loirinho offered us a spliff and I had some. It worked a bit more this time. It felt like I was dreaming, my eyes sort of worked but my brain was muddled up. I came home and was back to normal in an hour. I think the whole trip lasted 1:45. I smoked at 10:30 in the morning. Rilson was going to call me at 11:15 but I didn’t answer, I didn’t want him to see me with bloodshot eyes and bags under my eyes. My eyes were back to normal at 13:15, when I went out. We went to 205, Renata was after Ginho, don’t think she realises he’s no longer interested. He’s being really cold towards her, he clearly doesn’t like her, and she’s going around telling everyone they are together… She’s talking about him all the time (she really likes Deca but I think she’s trying to forget him). I feel sorry for her, he never went looking for her.
When we got there Ginho, his brother and a friend were going to go to a farm nearby to go for a smoke, he called us, Alexandra and I went, Renata and Ana didn’t come. I think they wanted to go but were scared or something. It took 45 minutes to get three, we smoked a spliff, Ginho’s brother and friend went somewhere and the three of us walked along a river and a pond. We went for a swim without clothes on, we were so stoned. I was laughing so much. My head was so heavy on the way back I closed my eyes and I was tripping. Ginho kept bugging me not to fall asleep. When we got back to 205 there were lots of people there, Binho, Renata, Vivi, Ana, Loirinho. We were soaking, so I came home to change.
Rilson called me at 6 and said he’d come to see me if he didn’t go to Objetivo’s party. I was tired and barely spoke on the phone, he thought it was odd and was a bit suspicious. He’s a bit insecure and thinks I’m with someone else when I’m not with him. He did see my Chemistry book and it said ‘Leticia and Henrique’ on it. He keeps asking who Henrique is. We only see each other once a week because of my exams and his work… It’s his birthday on the 10th and I am going to get him a gift. It will be our 1 month anniversary on the 9th. A month! But we have only seen each other seven times, the rest was over the phone. I don’t really like him, although I do find him attractive. The only person I really like is Henrique. Why did I miss so many chances? I called him and he’s away in Paracatu.
Went to 205 in the evening, lots of people there. I smoked again, but not too much, and was just a bit dizzy. Alexandra smoked lots and was wasted. Rilson didn’t call me, I guess he went to Objetivo’s party.